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Showing posts from April, 2008

Screen

So, I really need to start screen or filtering my emotions before I write them down I think! I am like a rollercoaster lately of emotions and it's killin' me! I mean yesterday I felt exactly the way I said I did in the morning, but by afternoon I was much better - maybe because of prayer. But I maybe should have waited to to vent until later, when I was more at ease instead of so glum. Don't you feel sorry for my hubby!! Anyway, I prayed alot yesterday and last night, and I think I'm getting myself undercontrol, reigning in those fiery horses of hormones, and trying to tap in to ME! Who is that anyway? For so long I have been the "pregnant girl"..."oh look, she's pregnant again"....You have a one year old, when are you due again??" I'm almost there though, almost will have myself back! But for now, I am going to enjoy the last baby brewing in my uterus, and please forgive the rollercoaster of emotions!! Although, I'm trying to stay m

What to say

I am having an emotional morning, hormones I am assuming. I left for work and Brady started crying, I hugged him and he wouldn't let go, and I did not want to let go either. I've been late to work for the past 6 times I've had to come in, not by my own account...and that is totally frustrating. Then to top it off, my desk is bombarded with little yellow sticky notes, "Megan you are going here today....Megan, can you get this file out for me....Megan re-schedule our appointment for Wed. to Thurs..." I am totally irritated. The client I am now scheduled to see today that I did not have on my schedule before, is one that is my most challenging and the one I have the least amount of patience for. I can see her wheels turning each time I go in, on how to control her environment by being the nastiest, loudest and rudest client I have dealth with in a long time. I try to think of her past, take in to consideration her disability, but it's just not working. Seriousl

I was tagged

A: Attached or Single? Attached B: Best Friend? My sister, Courtney C: Cake or Pie? Cake! D: Day of Choice? Any day I am not working! E; Essential Item? chapstick F: Favorite Color? Purple G: Gummy Bears or Worms? Worms...sour worms !H: Hometown? Cambridge I: Indulgence? CANDY J: January or July? January (merely because it is when I married my husband) K: Kids? 2 with the 3rd bakin' L: Life isn’t complete without? Love M: Marriage date? 1/10/03 N: Number of brothers and sisters? 2 brothers (one with Jesus) and one sister with scattered steps in between! O: Oranges or apples? Oranges P: Phobias and fears? Being taken away from my children Q: Quote? A long one, but "When You Thought I wasn't Looking..." R: Reason to smile? My miracles, my kids S: Season of choice? Spring, when it arrives the proper way T: Tag three people? Courtney, Kristen, Jenni (if you all haven't done it yet)! U: Unknown fact about me? I have a tattoo, and I can't wait to get more V: Veg

I wish I would have known

I wish I would have known you were only here a while. I would have listened more, though I was only a child. I wish I would have known the importance of your words the importance of your history though the thought did not occur. I wish I would have known that each hug could be the last. Instead I ran around it all happened far to fast. I wish I would have known to breathe you in a little more. To know the man you were, To love you to the core. I wish I would have known that love endures forever. But then I wouldn't know how to love you better. I wish I would have known death really meant new life. But now that I am older new life has me revived. I wish I would have known that you can here me now. But now I do; and I can say, "I really, truly, always, will forever have love for you." In rememberance of the men I have lost in my life... Jason Robert Grell ~ My brother, my friend Eugene Ralph Aszmann ~ My loving Grandfather whose hugs I miss the most Great-Grandpa Foss ~ who

SLEEPY!

I am soooooooo sleepy today! I'm not 100% sure why, I mean, there are some obvious reasons I know, but man! I think I am still recuperating from my Saturday evening, which I spent at my friends lovely baby shower! It was a really nice shower, a perfect evening with my friends. I got there at 6pm and left at 11pm!! I could have stayed longer too. But, when it was all done, I got in my car and thought, "If we have such a wonderful time together, why can't we do this more often?" I really hope things change,(even though 3 new babies are due among us this summer), and maybe it is because I am on 3 kids that I am so used to doing things, and they may not be as comfortable in running around and doing... I don't know. I just know I love those girls, we had a splendid time and I'm praying that it will happen more.
Baby Gender Predictor

June 13th

That's when I am due with this little one in my belly! Some people had been wondering and I didn't know if I had said a certain due date! So that's when I SHOULD have the baby by! Although my husband is predicting May 28th. I don't really know when, just anything but after...

Rainy, but green and yet, sad...

The rain is just a pourin' outside today, but WOW, I love the green grass that is coming along with it. And I swear I could sit and watch my daylily's and iris's grow right in front of my eyes!! It's amazing to me how fast the just pop up out of the cold dirt! With all of this life popping up around me, and the one inside me, you would think I should be bursting with excitement. I've been feeling a little not like myself though the last couple of days, and it truly bothers me. Nothing extreme, and I know what it is for the most part. Melissa, you just posted about losing a friendship, and I have said this before too. I feel like I am losing some really great friends that I've had for like over 10 years! We always have such a great time when we get together, but in the down time, I try and try and try to call, email, text saying "Let's go for a walk....wanna meet for coffee half way...miss ya!" Then either they don't call back or email for like

Yipeeee!

What a great weekend huh? Well, Sunday anways! We were outside Sunday from 1pm until 7:45pm! The kids did not even stop to take a nap! We had my sister-n-laws over and then neighbors continued to drop by...it was lovely. But now, the kids and I woke up this morning hacking and sneezing and my voice seemed to be taken over by the truck driver down the road who smokes 3 packs a day. Other than that it was totally worth it! Saturday I did laundry and cleaned, and that felt good to get that out of the way. My poor little husband had already gotten a cold and was needing to be babied A LOT. Oh well. Friday I had my doctor visit and an ultrasound. My visit was fantastic, as always since my midwife is a hoot! Today I think we talked about kids roomming together and why she only had two kids...hilarious. But the greatest news which I wasn't expecting was her telling me that if I don't gain any weight in two more weeks, she's going to have to yell at me to eat more! What??!!That was

Family

I was just sitting here thinking about the importance of family..... When I see my family.... When I see my family I know what it is like for the Sun to rise above the horizon and shed forth light unto us all. I know how the songbird feels when she fills her small lungs with air to let the first beautiful notes that morning is here reach our ears; just like the first morning my child awoke and could say, "I love you mommy." I know how the first Spring Wind rejoices as it crosses the earth and touches every being of life as they breathe in the innocence and wonders of the world as I hold my child and brush the hair out of her eyes and stare in wonderment. I know how the rain cloud must feel as it swells with moisture and finally releases the drops of water that nourish our world and I look at my children as they gaze up and wonder if God is crying tears of joy that he can look down unto them and smile. When I see my family I can see beyond the ocean, land and air and fee

60 days to go....

Only sixty more days to go and only 44 days by my husbands prediction . Not too shabby!! I am so anxious to meet my new baby and find out what gender I've been carrying these past few months!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Contractions...

So, here it goes again!! I'm having early contractions just like I did with Halloran's pregnancy around this time. It started last week at work on Wednesday for about 4 hours. Then I was good until about Sunday. After church until about 1 in the morning! Right before I went to bed they were pretty consistent, but I thought I would try and sleep them away! My plan worked eventually, and I was fine in the morning. But then around noon they struck again. So this time to be on the safe side I called my midwife and she said I should come in and be monitored for a little bit. So my neighbor came over and I went in, totally dreading it because I must have gone in with Halle about 4 times (3 times late, late in the night) and I don't want to history to repeat itself. But, there's no action going on down below-what I mean is I'm not dilated or anything and the protein test showed I won't be having the baby anytime soon, so that was all great! But, I was indeed having con

In my home, there is a battle

They lurk in the dreary depths of the cold cave, taunting, haunting my every move. I try to forget about the inevitable battle, a battle between good and evil. Soon time will catch up with me and the looming task, a desperate need will rise above my procrastination. For the battle is a long, dark winding road with many hardships, and I know my very soul will be tested. In time, I will have to step inside the depths of the cold cave, confronting the long awaited battle that waits for me. Ever so patiently it waits and yearns to be tackled, it longs for the day I overcome my fear and win the battle. ~That day was yesterday, and the battle....... Laundry.~ A poem by Megan Bergman :)

The Land Before Time...

Brady Loves these movies. He got a few new ones for his birthday and he just loves to watch them. It's actually been really cool, because he now know about 10 different dinosaur names and which ones are the mean ones or as he calls them Sharptooths/"predators" and which ones are the nice ones- the ones that just eat leaves and grass and stuff! In one of the new movies, it's about the "Lone Dinosaur" who roams the earth saving other dinosaurs. The "Lone Dinosaur" can knock a sharptooth down with the swing of his great tail. So, Brady thinks he is the "Lone Dinosaur". At the dinner table he will use whatever looks like a tail (french fry, carrot...) and stick it by his rear end and say, "I'm the Lone Dinosaur, and I got the sharptooths..." Then he'll swing his "tail" back and forth....freakin' hilarious!

Beautiful....

Here are just a few of the pictures that were taken on Saturday by my co-worker. I think he did an amazing job and he just does this for fun!

Movin' In

So, this weekend we did the big move! Halloran became a resident in her brother's room. I was so nervous to start the process. I knew we should be doing it soon, but a kind shove from my midwife the week before really got us moving. So Saturday Tom went and picked upt the FREE twin mattresses that I had found on CraigsList the day before. I knew that they were used by small children during their potty training years and I figured we were doing the same so "...what the hay?" When he brought them home, they were a little rougher than what I had anticipated, so I was somewhat dissapointed. But, Tom cleaned them up really good and we let them sit outside all day and then we Lysol'd the begeezes out of them and then an antibacterial Febreeze spray down. Plus two mattress pads and a vinyl mattress waterproof cover. SO, that put me more at ease with the free mattress situation! Then I took the kids to the park to meet a c0-worker who took the time to take some picture of my

Bath tub conversations....

Here were the conversations at bath time last night with my kids: ME: "Brady please stop drinking the water!" "Halle, please sit down, your going to fall down!" "Brady, please stop drinking the water!" "Halle, sit down...please." BRADY: "Momma, why are you cleaning us?" "Can you wash me up again?" -ME- "No, mommy's tummy is too big to bend over again, you're already clean, ok bud?" BRADY: "Why's your tummy too big? ME: "Because the baby's getting bigger in mommy's tummy? BRADY: "Why's it getting bigger?" ME: "It has to get bigger before the baby can come and live with us?" BRADY: "It will live in the bathtub?" ME: "No sweetie, it's going to sleep in Halle's room, that's why she's going to start sleeping in your room." BRADY: "(pause)...

Right now...

Right now I am feeling more like myself than I have in the last couple of days. The last couple of days I have felt like I had just been wandering in around in an empty body. I'm not sure why. I did have a stomach ache, which returned this morning, and that has made me feel, obviously, sick and not myself. But there is something else, and I cannot pinpoint it. I can get this way when we've missed going to church the previous Sunday, which did happen, and I've noticed that when I've been praying I feel like I just want to get it over with. Weird.' Right now though, I feel as though, maybe, I am clearing the path back to myself. Although I know I won't be able to fully get there until I have figured out exactly what my roadblocks are. The weird thing is, is that I am at work which is an odd place to start the journey back. Work has always seemed like one of my road blocks to my ultimate happiness. I have a good, flexible job. Though it is not what I want to be do

Ok....

Annoying guy at work just stepped in the office with a chapstick like device up his nose. He stood there and did a couple puffs up each nostril then said, "I'll leave you alone, your pregnant and I'm sick so I dont want to get too close." Then why are you here, in my office, knowing I'm pregnant with a thingy up your nose. He is not helping in my goal to get over his annoyingness. That event did not help. Please pray for me. (don't worry, I didn't say anything rude, just hope you feel better and yes, please don't get too close.)

What a Weekend!

I must say that this last weekend was by far one of the busiest that I have encountered in a long time. It was Brady's Party weekend and I was super excited. But, let's recap the days... FRIDAY: Friday we all had doctor appointments. Brady and Halle had theirs schedules at 11:20 am and 11:40 am. We were running a little behind schedule, but not bad until I heard a knock on the bathroom door (I was trying to fit in a shower, silly me). Brady was crying and you know, the kind where they can't make a complete sentence. "I....money...tummy..." Me, "What?? You swallowed money?" Brady, "Yeaaaah uggh ahh awwwww...." So, I calmly said, "Ok, well, we're going to the doctor soon anyway, she'll make it better for you sweetie. Now mommy has to finish her shower, do you want to take a bath while you're in here?" Brady, "Yeaaah." So, I finished, hopped out and let my son take a bath, which cured the crying. Halle had been